My advice is take your time.. you had great dialogue but kept smashing everything else togetheranonymous readerReport 2012-11-12 17:47:47Yum! Mom xxx 2 comments«1»badbabysitterReport 2012-11-14 03:42:42Strong middle, but the run on paragraphs tend to detract from the story.. Great story. i feel parts of it were very rushed. My advice is take your time.. Hope it was true because women like you add joy and zest to life.«1» i feel parts of it were very rushed. Hope it was true because women like you add joy and zest to life.«1» Great story. you had great dialogue but kept smashing everything else togetheranonymous readerReport 2012-11-12 17:47:47Yum! you had great dialogue but kept smashing everything else togetheranonymous readerReport 2012-11-12 17:47:47Yum!
