14 comments«123»anonymous readerReport 2013-11-18 00:04:36I personally liked it but i have to agree that you should work on your spelling and para graphing and dialogueanonymous readerReport 2013-05-05 00:56:07Hard to read, needs more explanation
But a good storyanonymous readerReport 2013-02-19 22:53:09Terrible. Hot mom xxx Spelling, the sudden change in the story, punctuation. Also, try some paragraphs.«123» Bad bad badanonymous readerReport 2012-12-09 09:21:17Please look up how to write dialogue this story would be much better if you could tell what they are saying, also alot of the pronouns are wrong, before posting please proof readanonymous readerReport 2012-04-22 21:14:46Great story, but the constant lack of punctuation and spelling errors really kept me from fully appreciating the whole story. Underage girls? Also, try some paragraphs.«123» 14 comments«123»anonymous readerReport 2013-11-18 00:04:36I personally liked it but i have to agree that you should work on your spelling and
